Why Men Don't Want A Relationship

I'm 27 and the longest relationship I have ever been in was about 6 months, the reason for this is that I was (and probably still am) completely unable at having one. The easy to describe reason for this is that I'm really really into myself, not in a narcissistic shallow way, but in a "I want to do what I want, when I want" kind of way. The older I get the more I realize that wasting my life doing unenjoyable things is not fun, therefore why do it? This mindset has been one I've questioned a lot recently because of someone I met. I am notorious for only considering a relationshp after I've been friends with a girl for a long time, this always ends me up in the "friend zone" for better or worse. For me it was always a matter of actually enjoying spending time with a girl, so adding sex to the equation too soon will prohibit me from getting to know her better. Since most guys are into finding a hole as quickly as possible to bang, this leaves women with the perception that since I havent tried to sleep with you yet, I'm interested.