Friday, October 12, 2012

Want to Hire/Woo Gen Y & Millennials? Ignore the Internet

I just read this piece from the Wall Street Journal describing how oXYGen Financial use stupid marketing tactics to attempt to appeal to younger consumers and it greatly emblematic of what's wrong with America. Yes, that statement is hyperbolic but it's 100% true, businesses have absolutely no clue anymore and have completely lost their shit. Just reading that article makes me wonder how successful their business model is, because it seems to me paying $90 for "investment advice" seems like bullshit from every angle.

People from my generation have been marked to 24/7 for our ENTIRE LIVES, so how does a company that clearly gets this fail so hard. If you look at the last sentence of the article it states "They want to know exactly how you're going to make money off of them and the last thing they want to hear is some slick sales speech" which is truthful, everything else contradicts this statement.

Fuck social media, fuck generational wall building, and fuck these internet business content mills that spout shit that business leaders believe. Why do none of these articles speak of the companies successes and failures? The point of a business is to make money, this is surprising news to maney.

So why do these companies spout nonsense about how attracting younger customers while also clearly missing the point? It's because there is only one way to get the "internet generation" which is a much better term I believe, and that is by offering a quality product or service. Apple is still growing because their products are great, people are cancelling their cable service because the product is shitty....does this make sense?  Apparently not because companies would rather drone on about social media and "fun events" rather than providing honest customer testimonials explaining why we should use their product.

Within the next few months I will be launching my own business, and I will use what I've learned from 15+ years as an internet addict to attempt to build and grow this business. Doing this won't be easy but it sure as hell will be more rewarding than watching assholes take advantage of younger customers and employees. So instead of figuring out how to value a "like", I will be charging for a product and utilizing Facebook and Twitter to promote said product. It seems alarmingly simple but it's something that most companies with 60+ year old leadership are failing at massively.

This blog has a lot of posts bitching about older generations, and I feel I should end this post with an explanation. I'm so upset about this because I know I'm a better employee/worker/person than most of you, but I am stuck in a rigid system of conformity and mindless merit-based hiring practices. This is shit you started and accepted. In my past work experience (note I said PAST and not current as my current employer is fantastic and progressive) here are some things that go on which I can't believe are still happening in 2012 (AND IT'S YOUR FUCKING FAULT). So if any of you manager types that are bored and reading this online because your employees are doing all of your work, here is why they hate your guts.

  • Why are there 2 hour meetings that should only be 10 minutes? 

  • Why are work shifts set in hours instead of task completion? If someone completes a task in 2 hours that takes someone else 10 and then has 8 hours of boredom, why are they punished for being a better employee?

  • Why do you give a fuck what any employee looks like if they get the job done correctly and quickly? It's 2012 and your stupid dress codes and anti-tattoo/piercing shit is dying fast.

  • Why should anyone respect you just because you are older? No one has EVER given me a good reason for this, as respect is always earned and not given based on arbitrary age requirements. Oh and most of the "wisdom" they think they possess, can be Googled.

  • Why do we have to be your IT department and still get paid less than Everyone in the IT department?
These are all giant disconnects I have noticed in the new "generation gap" and I hope that the generation I am from stands up for themselves more and realizes they don't have to work in this system, they can change it by being outspoken or doing their own shit.